...IT'S TIME FOR A SENTIMENTAL POST!!! *imaginary crowd goes wild*
So, tomorrow is going to be my last exam of the year, maybe forever. I can't believe time flies by so quickly. What a year it has been. So many ups and downs, although more ups than downs i have to say. Tonight is no different from any typical night one year ago - im sitting at my laptop in my room, illuminated by only a lamp, writing a blogpost while listening to the reassuring sounds of midnight rain outside my window. Yet something has changed. While i still feel uncertain about my future, I am more confident about my present.
When i turned 21, people told me that this year would be my year. I didn't believe them. To me, it seemed like it was going to be just another year. A year devoid of change, devoid of progress, devoid of hope.
Boy was i was wrong. 2012, whether it is the year that the world ends or simply the natural successor of 2011, is a year that to me, stands out from the rest. It has been a year of self-discovery, of progress, and of new experiences. While the esoteric "Career" which the older generations preach of still has yet to appear on the horizon, I have made some new progress in my life. I've acquired my full drivers license, and am just about to complete my Bacherlors degree and Postgraduate diploma, among other things. Things that i thought i wasn't capable of, things that i thought i wouldn't be able to accomplish this year, I have now managed to achieve *hopefully*. These things have given me new confidence, new hope, and a renewed excitement for the future.
One of my biggest worries in the past few years is that i won't be able to find a job when i graduate, that i will let my entire family down. But what this year has taught me, if nothing else, is that if i put my mind to something, i can achieve it. I feel that over this year, i have learnt to become comfortable with who i am. Some of the people that i used to surround myself with made me feel that there was something wrong with me. But getting away from them, being by myself, and meeting new people has made me gain a new appreciation for who i am. Yes, i am still flawed. But my perception of myself has changed, and I can feel myself changing alongside it. With my changing self-perception, i feel that the way i engage with others has also changed. I no longer feel a desperate need to be liked, to belong, to fit in. I know who my real friends are, I know who i am, and these are the precious things that i will hold on to.
So, tomorrow is going to be my last exam. Although i didn't get 9A+ like i said i would, i may still be able to end this year with one A+ if all goes well tomorrow. Even if i don't, its okay, because whatever the future holds for me - be it success, failure, happiness or heartbreak - i feel like i am more capable of facing it head on.
To all those that feel like they are struggling in life: chin up mate, you're not alone, so don't ever give up the fight.
Exciting times ahead. FIGHT ON!
